They set out in good spirits. Their bags were packed with nourishment and sustenance for the hard journey ahead. The weather forecast implied a chance of rain and sunshine, which usually is as good as it gets in Vancouver. Moreover, given the 50/50 nature of this prediction, there was no way it could be wrong...This would truly be an excellent day to conquer the heights of Bowen Island's fearsome peak that rose 2480 feet above sea level: Mount Gardner.
The journey to base camp was said to be rough and perilous. It would require the group to acquire a ship willing to take them over the rough seas to the dark and sinister hamlet of 'Snug Cove'. Despite being warned of the quality of the vessels available in Horseshoe Bay, the group decided to take its chances and nevertheless, embarked on the trip.
Brooding weather ahead
Snug Cove was as grim as its name implies. Upon arrival, the group was met with the smell of undefined meat being roasted on barbecues and warning signs indicating the wicked nature of the Cove. As quickly as possible, the hardy group left the hamlet... Sadly, the evil coming from “Snug” was spread out everywhere: The countryside around Snug was littered with the most gruesome poaching devices , defiled with free “doggy bags” dispensers and spoiled with picknic tables.
As they left the Snug area behind, the group of mountaineers thought they found some reprieve at the tranquil shores of Killarney Lake. However, their peace was short lived as they encountered the ferocity of the local wildlife, the Killarney duck. Bowen Island is host to many of Canadia's most dangerous beasts. The Killarney duck is one of more dangerous ones, only outdone in human casualties by the Bowen Slimy Slug, the Red Furry Woodpecker and the Imaginary Black Bowen Cave Bear.
Killarney Lake, with the ferocious duck hiding behind the tree
Barely making it through the duck encounter without severe casualties, the mountaineers set onwards.
The road upward was steep and filled with brutal challenges. The mountaineers had to conquer gaping chasms over a dangerous stream, bypass deceptive swamps, evade deep pits and climb until their limbs were sore and tired... then climb some more until their energy was completely spent... then climb even further until their legs could no longer support their weight. It was vile slaughter.
Despite the hardships nature threw at them, they remained resilient. Whenever their spirits seemed to fail, they told themselves they would find the peak of the mountain around the next corner, just behind the next patch of trees or beyond that vertical ridge. One more step, one more climb ...
Whether they made it to the top or not is unknown. But that's not the point; it is not the destination that matters, it's the road to that destination. It's about overcoming the challenging hardships on that road. It's about going beyond the limitations of one's own fragile human corpus and achieving things one could have never imagined. It's about knowing that despite the worst that could and will happen, there will always, inevitably, be an end to that the road where a snug pub is waiting to sell you overpriced but cool beer and cheesy nachos (or even a burger).
the south-side outlook
Somewhat in the appropriate spirit of subtext feelings... Despair.com
1 comment:
you big doofus.
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